Welcome to my journey, destination MELANIN and MOTHERHOOD! What a journey it has been thus far! I welcome you on my 21st week of pregnancy and I could not be happier. I cannot say this has been easy, but nonetheless I am BLESSED!
Ever since I can remember I have dreamed of becoming a mother and having endured several years of failed attempts at dating and relationships, it seemed that motherhood would only remain a “dream.”
Well along came my love, my black King, the one who represents all I have desired in TRUE LOVE! He swept me off my feet from the very beginning, I experienced authentic love from a REAL MAN and the rest is a love story still being written. From a ring to a baby on the way we are on a magnificent journey together.
Now I have always thought of myself to be a Queen, however, for majority of my life, I “Ruled” my own “Royal Court” solo. And while it is empowering to do so, it’s even better with my King at my side!
Trimester one and the first half of trimester two were pretty rough… Morning sickness on top of afternoon sickness on top of evening and night sickness… I guess by now you get it. I was SICK all the time it seemed. Through it all though, the baby has always been just fine, and that is okay with me!
Week 21 has come with a renewed elation about what is happening in my life. The subtle, yet significant settling of hormones, reduced mood swings and most certainly, the almost diminished morning sickness, have restored my excitement about this “Miracle I have been chosen to perform.”
Slowly but surely, I have returned to the recreational activities that bring me great pleasure and have health benefits as well. Those who know me best, know I love Salsa and I am back at it! Now, I am no doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but if your doctor clears you to do so, I certainly suggest that you do what you LOVE!
Over this time, I had to remember that becoming a mother does not mean you necessarily shed all of what makes you, “You!” It is important not to “lose yourself” along the way and continue to be the best of you as you make this transition.
In a society that often exploits broken black families and seemingly goes out of its way to expose unfit black mothers, single or otherwise, just doing your best to remain healthy and properly prepare for your baby, comes with the additional pressure to reflect the opposite.
I am fortunate to be able to afford and receive prenatal care, thrive in my career, balance a home life and community activism, all while pregnant. We all may not be as fortunate and some of us may be even more fortunate, but our #BLACKGIRLMAGIC is REAL! It is that magic that carries me through the best and WORST of times during this journey.
All black families are not broken and certainly all black mothers are not unfit parents. I choose not to accept societal portrayals and instead demonstrate #BLACKEXCELLENCE on this journey of #MELANINANDMOTHERHOOD. I encourage you to do the same!
I’ll check in with you next week. Be courageous, be encouraged, and remember, MELANIN AND MOTHERHOOD is BLACK GIRL MAGIC PERSONIFIED!
Yours On This Journey,
Crystal D. Charley-Sibley, MBA
Founder of Melanin and Motherhood, Co-Founder of Queen Village LLC, is a community activist, women's empowerment speaker, a first-time mother, and wife, chronicling her journey of motherhood!