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  Melanin and Motherhood
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"Bad Momma!"

7/30/2017

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After a long day at work, I returned home to find my man working hard in 90 degree heat! He rented a pick-up truck and brought home some new furniture earlier that day.  Since we are preparing for baby, we're taking care of some much needed home improvement. As I approached the front door I was greeted with, "Well hello beautiful" as he continued to move heavy furniture about...

I instantly lit up, as he has a way of making me feel like a Queen no matter how I may be feeling in that moment. 

As I entered the home, I expressed how exhausted I was. He replied by saying, "I'm sorry to hear that you're exhausted, I kinda hoped you'd take the ride with me to return the truck."  

While I was tired, I instantly realized the importance of the little things, and that he was looking forward to us spending time together.  With that realization, there was nothing more to say than, "Let's ride! "  

I grabbed my keys and followed him to the truck. As I approached the truck he asked me "Do you want to drive? "  He knew I would say yes, as "pushin" this big ole pick-up truck would feed my driving alter ego!  I hopped  (well slowly climbed up) into the truck, put my shades on said, "You're riding with Bad Momma!" LOL! 

He held my hand as we drove off and even snapped a couple of pictures of me behind the wheel of the truck. He was quite tickled by my delight in handling the vehicle as "Bad Momma."  
In the midst of the trip, I forgot about my fatigue and got "lost in our quality time."  It was not a big trip, vacation or even a "date night" of dinner and movie, it was simply the message of "I missed you today." "I'm glad you're home." "Let's spend some time together."  

As I am preparing for motherhood, I recognize that it is important to make time for the two of us. It's imperative that I am attentive to his needs and continue to magnify his significance in my life, even with a baby on the horizon. 

You see, he treats me as a Queen and so I reciprocate, treating him as a King! Trust me, the RETURN ON INVESTMENT ALWAYS MAKES IT WORTH IT! 

We believe that "Black Love" is INFINITE and are committed to strength of our "BLACK FAMILY!"

This was a great day!

Until next time...  Be courageous, be encouraged, MELANIN AND MOTHERHOOD is BLACK GIRL MAGIC PERSONIFIED!

Yours On This Journey,
Crystal

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"Coconut Oil and Me"

7/16/2017

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While on this journey I have experienced so many changes in my body, it is unbelievable!  As I am sure we have all heard during maternity, that every pregnancy is different, yet there are several commonalities among us.

Rather early in my pregnancy, I would say in my second or third month, I noticed that rather than having this tremendous glow all the time, my skin was less than radiant… In fact, it was DRY!!! By the time noon came around I looked as if though I washed my face, showered and walked out of the house without applying any moisturizer, anywhere, in January!

My regular lotion and facial moisturizer just was not cutting it.  So, I went to a very natural source and began to use it from head to toe.  Coconut Oil.

I chose an organic coconut oil by Shea Moisture. At first, I had to get used to the extreme shine of my skin, but as time passed the coconut oil penetrated my dry skin and restored it a healthy level of moisture.  I have also noticed that as my baby “bump” continues to grow, keeping it moisturized with the coconut oil has helped with my skin’s elasticity as it stretches.

I went on to read about the various health benefits of coconut oil and intend to continue with the skincare regimen well past gestation.   

Here are a few health benefits of coconut oil:
  • Coconut Oil is rich in Vitamin E and proteins that will nourish and protect your skin.  Unlike mineral oil, there is little chance of having any adverse side effects on the skin from the application of this oil, thus making it a safe solution for preventing dryness and flaking of skin. 
  • Coconut Oil helps in preventing degenerative diseases like premature aging due to its well-known antioxidant properties.
  • Coconut Oil helps in treating various skin problems, including psoriasis, dermatitis, eczema, and other skin infections
  • Coconut Oil can be used for makeup removal without drying effect sometimes caused by makeup removal pads, etc.. 
  • Coconut Oil also helps in healthy growth of hair, as it is highly effective in reducing protein loss while giving your hair a shiny quality.
 
What are some of your “go to” products for healthy skin?  As they say, “Sharing is caring” and we would love to hear from you!

Until next time…  Be courageous, be encouraged, MELANIN AND MOTHERHOOD is BLACK GIRL MAGIC PERSONIFIED!

Yours On This Journey,
Crystal
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Week 21 and Counting!

7/7/2017

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Welcome to my journey, destination MELANIN and MOTHERHOOD! What a journey it has been thus far! I welcome you on my 21st week of pregnancy and I could not be happier.  I cannot say this has been easy, but nonetheless I am BLESSED!

Ever since I can remember I have dreamed of becoming a mother and having endured several years of failed attempts at dating and relationships, it seemed that motherhood would only remain a “dream.”

Well along came my love, my black King, the one who represents all I have desired in TRUE LOVE! He swept me off my feet from the very beginning, I experienced authentic love from a REAL MAN and the rest is a love story still being written.  From a ring to a baby on the way we are on a magnificent journey together.

Now I have always thought of myself to be a Queen, however, for majority of my life, I “Ruled” my own “Royal Court” solo.  And while it is empowering to do so, it’s even better with my King at my side!

Trimester one and the first half of trimester two were pretty rough… Morning sickness on top of afternoon sickness on top of evening and night sickness… I guess by now you get it. I was SICK all the time it seemed.  Through it all though, the baby has always been just fine, and that is okay with me!

Week 21 has come with a renewed elation about what is happening in my life.  The subtle, yet significant settling of hormones, reduced mood swings and most certainly, the almost diminished morning sickness, have restored my excitement about this “Miracle I have been chosen to perform.”

Slowly but surely, I have returned to the recreational activities that bring me great pleasure and have health benefits as well.  Those who know me best, know I love Salsa and I am back at it! Now, I am no doctor, nor do I play one on TV, but if your doctor clears you to do so, I certainly suggest that you do what you LOVE!

Over this time, I had to remember that becoming a mother does not mean you necessarily shed all of what makes you, “You!” It is important not to “lose yourself” along the way and continue to be the best of you as you make this transition.

In a society that often exploits broken black families and seemingly goes out of its way to expose unfit black mothers, single or otherwise, just doing your best to remain healthy and properly prepare for your baby, comes with the additional pressure to reflect the opposite.
 
I am fortunate to be able to afford and receive prenatal care, thrive in my career, balance a home life and community activism, all while pregnant. We all may not be as fortunate and some of us may be even more fortunate, but our #BLACKGIRLMAGIC is REAL!  It is that magic that carries me through the best and WORST of times during this journey. 

All black families are not broken and certainly all black mothers are not unfit parents.  I choose not to accept societal portrayals and instead demonstrate #BLACKEXCELLENCE on this journey of #MELANINANDMOTHERHOOD.  I encourage you to do the same!

I’ll check in with you next week.  Be courageous, be encouraged, and remember, MELANIN AND MOTHERHOOD is BLACK GIRL MAGIC PERSONIFIED!

Yours On This Journey,
Crystal
 


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    Crystal D. Charley-Sibley, MBA

    Founder of  Melanin and Motherhood, Co-Founder of Queen Village LLC,  is a community activist, women's empowerment speaker, a first-time mother, and wife, chronicling her journey of motherhood!

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